How To Create Inner PEACE OF MIND
The "Inner Peace Process" is an NLP Mindfulness Method that helps Process Traumatic Stress into Post Traumatic Growth.
The basic premise is that you Go Within yourself and communicate with your unconscious parts that are causing you angst, grief, regret, guilt, resentment, disappointment, upset, confusion, etc. and heal or clear it as a result of inner communication and calling up inner resources to work together to help you move forward without the upset.
It doesn't matter what the upset is about. People suffering from Complex Trauma will have any number of triggers and upsets and it doesn't matter what it is, if you can feel it, you can heal it. The only thing you need to do to use the Inner Peace Process or IPP is to FEEL the upset somewhere in your body.
For example; when anxious some people feel a pressure in their chest, or when scared they feel it in their gut, or when sad they feel their heart is breaking, etc. The somatic marker can be anywhere you feel it - physically, energetically, vaguely, subtly.
When to go within. You 'go within' any time you pay attention to your inner mind or body from the inside. You use your imagination or your mind's eye to look within.
You stay awake, this is not hypnosis, you do not go into a trance, you are awake and conscious and you're wanting to ask the part of you that is upset some key questions.
So "you", the awake conscious you in the here and now, are upset about something (can be anything and it doesn't matter what it is, you don't have to go into the whole story of it, you don't have to say out loud what it is, you don't ever have to expose any of the content you want to keep private - all that you need is to feel an upset in your body.
The last time I used IPP, I was so upset with someone that triggered several feelings in me, that I noticed my hands were shaking and I was unable to 'talk' without getting upset or maybe crying, so I had to just hold it in and get away from where I was. As soon as I got to a safe place I handled it then. I used the IPP for about 10 minutes, and went back later like nothing was wrong and nothing had happened and no one knew I was ever upset.
So what did I do when I got by myself and was ready to use the IPP on myself? I went back to my hands being shaky and I got a sense of pressure in my chest and a little lump in my throat. So I went to my chest, because that's where I felt it most, and also that is usually where I have feelings when I'm upset. But I could have chosen my shaking hands, or lump in throat. It would still work and it doesn't matter.
The only thing that matters is that you tune into the physical sensation or the somatic marker of the emotional upset. Where do you feel it in your body?
Then you ask the 5 magic questions (sights (shape and color), weight, temperature and sound.
The process of asking those 5 sense questions is the process of going within more and more. Each time you go within to ask and pause and find the answer, you are going more within yourself and tuning more into the part of you that is generating the upset.
This unconscious part of you is wanting to get your attention - that's why it's causing a physical sensation, to alert you to your upset.
The more you pay attention to it, ask it questions and listen to its answers, the more you are forming a relationship with it and communicating with it.
The more you communicate with your inner parts, the easier it gets, and you'll get better at it over time where you'll be able to do this even faster and without much effort.
Doing the IPP over time also has this accumulated effect, where you are triggered less and less, less often and less intense. You'll notice things happen that used to get you upset that just don't anymore or you'll feel it very mildly. You will be as calm as a Tibetan Monk after 90 days or more of using it.
I like to suggest you use it for 5 - 15 minutes a day for 90 days.
This is easy to do if you make a list of 90 things/memories/people/arguments/situations, etc that have upset you in any way. List things that upset you by just thinking about them. It's OK if you have less or more than 90 things, the point is to start with a list. Each day you do the IPP on the next one on the list. If you think of more things, add them to the list. It's a good way to keep track of your progress.
First write the list of things that upset you.
Then write a SUDs score for each of those things (how much it upsets you on a scale of 1 - 10).
Then write the date next to the first one, and do the IPP.
Then give it an after score of 1 - 10 so you can see the difference.
Then the next day, write the date on the next thing on the list, the before SUDS and after SUDS.
And so on, clearing one issue per day for 90 days.
Using the IPP
So you identify an upset, you give it a SUDs score and you locate where you feel it in your body.
Then you go within and ask yourself the 5 magic questions about that sensation.
You ask what shape it is.
You pause and look with your mind's eye what shape is that sensation or energy in your chest or where ever it is and you get a sense of it or a clear shape appears in your mind. Let's say it's a large cube with rounded corners.
Then you go within, looking at the cube in your chest, you ask What color is it? And you look and you sort of get a sense of maybe bluish-black with dark purple but not completely black but it looks dark.
Then you ask it how much it weighs.
You go within to get a sense of how much would that weigh if I held it in my hands. Is it heavier than a bag of sugar? Does it feel like a loaf of bread? You get a sense and then guesstimate the weight. Let's say it feels like 2 pounds.
Then you go within again and ask yourself What temperature it is?
So you use your imagination, go within some more and feel it with your mind's eye, pretend you're touching it with your hands, does it feel cool or warm? Let's say it feels hot, hotter than you, so maybe 100 degrees.
Lastly you go within again and ask it What does it sound like. You pause and listen and try to get a sense of what do you hear. It might be silence or some sort of sound or maybe a voice with words. It could be a whirling sound or a white noise sound or calm silence or dead silence, just try to describe what you hear.
The answers do not matter, what matters is that as a result of asking these questions you have done several important things:
you've gone within yourself and quieted your conscious mind and your body is probably more relaxed too
you've gone within and listened to a part of you that needed to be acknowledged and heard
you've gone within and paid attention to a part of you instead of trying to cover it up, ignore it or get rid of it in some other way, maybe unhealthy ways like drinking or eating to get past an upset.
You've gone into a mildly meditative, mindful state of mind.
The reason I say they are 5 "magic" questions is that as a result of answering them, you are now talking to a Part of you, an inner, unconscious part, that now has a tangible shape. That makes it easier to communicate with it.
Now that you have something tangible to communicate with, that represents your upset, the first thing you want to do is ask it if it's willing to communicate with you. You'll get a yes or a no.
If yes, say 'thank you' and proceed.
If no, then put that aside while you go to calling in your inner resources below.
If yes, thank you for communicating with me, now let me ask you another question, what do you want? Pause and wait for the answer to bubble up inside of you.
It usually wants to protect you or help you in some way to stay safe. But whatever it says, you just listen and take it in. When its done answering, you can further clarify by asking How is it helping you right now by coming up?
Most times it wants you to not be treated bad, or not to forget something, or to get away or to have a boundary. It's there for a reason and everything about you is trying to survive, so whatever the upset is, it is trying to help you survive something. Even if it's not rational or mature or even if it doesn't work, your inner you is trying the best it can to help you. Maybe its there to remind you that you have some healing to do around that issue.
So my chest was a reaction of fear and I talked to that fear and asked it how it was helping me and it flat out said to 'give me a signal that is not a safe person' and I already knew that but it needed me to be able to set a boundary and explain it as matter of fact and not be upset. So first I had to calm down the upset so I could be brave enough to go say what I needed to say to keep myself safe and happy.
So now I got this part, I've described it in physical terms, its communicating with me and told me why it's acting up and I've thanked it. I now have a relationship with it. It trusts me because I took the time to listen because I care.
Now you can pretend to put that object in your left hand and let your left hand represent that part of you that is upset so you can move on with the process.
You've used your imagination to put that body sensation into your left hand, and now you use your imagination to put your inner resources into your right hand.
I like to use these 9 resources but you can use any you want, I just always end with compassion because that is where you want to be at the end, having compassion for yourself for having this upset and for going through whatever you went through before to have this as a trigger.
The 9 resources states below are words I say one at a time, pausing and feeling each word, or remembering a time I felt each word, until they are all in my right hand and they all create a resourceful state or part.
Love
Strength
Courage
Centeredness
Gratitude
Faith
Energy
Power
Compassion
Now I have my problem in my Left hand and my Resource states in my Right hand.
Now there is me, and my left hand and my right hand all working together.
I ask my Left hand if it's willing to work with the Right hand to resolve this problem, to get what it wants (to keep me safe) but without the emotional upset (in my chest), and usually the Left hand will 'say' yes. Sometimes it says 'no' and when it does I just smack my hands together to collapse it. Which still works. The resource state remains and the upset is usually gone. The reason the left hand says 'no' is usually because its not a useful part anymore, it's outgrown its usefulness and is just stuck and needed to move out. The Right hand will collapse a negative anchor because it is full of resources to take its place.
If the left hand says 'yes', then you let the two hands face each other. I usually like to tell the left hand to "tell the right hand all your problems and issues, or give all your issues and questions and problems to the right hand from the roots to the leaves," and I give it a few seconds to send all its problems to the right hand, and while it's doing that I instruct the Right hand to take it all in and start coming up with some new ideas to help me move forward toward my goal. I tell the Right hand to work on this for the next 24 hours but to maybe give me 1 idea in the next 5 minutes. This suggestion works well because I get at least 1 idea now and the rest I can let go and know that unconsciously my mind is still working out the problem.
Once this feels done, I allow the left and right hands to come together, move toward each other and hold each other, and really hold your hands together for a few seconds, and then acknowledge that you have just formed a new 3rd part, this new part is going to help you move forward.
You ask yourself, if this new part had a name, what would it be? Just see what comes up.
You can ask this new part the 5 magic questions and get a sense of a tangible part if you want, this helps make it stronger and easier to remember later, but its not necessary to do every time.
Most of the time I just ask the new 3rd part, my hands holding each other, a couple more questions and then wrap it up.
I ask, now that this problem is resolved what is the first thing I need to do to take care of myself?
I pause and wait for a good answer of at least 1 thing I can do, a task that I can put on my calendar today, tomorrow or in the the next week. I want something to do in the very near future for this to work best.
I write that down. I see myself doing it in the near future, and I see myself done with it, now I ask, once I'm done with that what is the second thing I need to do to take care of myself to move forward. I pause and get a sense of one more thing to do in the near future.
This is called future-pacing. It brings out some real life things to do to carry the inner healing out into the real world. The new part is usually very clever about knowing what you need because it is made up of the triggered problem plus your inner resources that are working on the problem so it knows exactly what you need.
Make sure the answers feel right. You can do an ecology check and ask if there is any part of you that opposes these tasks you're about to do and see if there are any more parts that need attention, etc.
Usually these is no objection and no other upset parts, but if there were, you just write that down and use the IPP on that specific problem as a separate session. But for now, you just note it down and realize that your next step may be to do the IPP on another issue before you can move forward.
It doesn't matter, all things that come up inside of you are usually for your good or to keep you safe or happy.
What I've learned, and why I say "it doesn't matter" when I talk about what answers come up is, that you are trusting your inner self to know what you need, so you just accept what comes up without judgement. The work is the going within and the inner communication and the integration of the parts - not any of the content. So don't analyze the content. You may gleam insights from the content, but that's not the important part. The important part is the result: you have less emotional impact and you feel at Peace with yourself as a result of the Inner Peace Process.
The Official Cheat Sheet
JP Bailey’s NLP Ninja - Parts Integration - Inner Peace Process - 3 Basic Versions
1. Everything in this world has a purpose or it wouldn’t exist.
a. Including all of our fears, doubts, and painful emotions, etc.
b. Finding that purpose can be the key to wholeness
2. Three variations of a process called “Parts Integration” from NLP, I call:
a. The Smile Maker
b. The Courage Creator
c. The Smack Down
3. Each process starts with defining the part. Talk about the problem until you feel it. That feeling is the part we are going to communicate with. It can be a sensation, a feeling, a sense, a thought, an experience, a memory, etc. Whatever it is that shows up is a part of you that you are going to communicate with.
A. The Smile Maker
1. Either ask where the part/feeling is in your body and/or imagine holding the part of you generating the problem/feeling, (say, your fear of leaving your job to start your own business), in your left hand. Either way works; you can describe it first then put it in your left hand, or put it in your left hand first and then describe it. Define the part and describe it by answering these 5 questions:
a. What color is it?
b. What shape is it?
c. How heavy is it?
d. What is the temperature?
e. What sound does it make?
2. Communicate with this part:
a. Ask it if it’s willing to communicate with you
b. What does it want?
c. Is it trying to help you in some way?
d. How?
e. Ask it if it would it be willing to help us achieve our goals without having to feel X (the fear, anger, or whatever)?
f. Note: If we can get this part to cooperate and become our ally without being held back by the emotion, that’s the best bet.
But sometimes we need to activate a positive state in the right hand, if so, go on to…
B. The Courage Creator - Transform the Part
1. In your other hand add a new part, filled with lots of good stuff: love, strength, courage, peace, centeredness, grounded, gratitude, faith, power, realizing you are an expert, your life force, pride, self-esteem, compassion, (Other positive states to call up/activate can be: able, eager, worthy, optimistic, excited, powerful self, importance, competent, growing, resourceful, creative, healing, nurturing, proactive, in control, responsible, thoughtful, solution-oriented, smart, self-regulating, mature, courageous, friendly, kind, understanding, optimizing, growth-oriented, etc.)
2. Define this part:
a. What color is it?
b. What shape is it?
c. How heavy is it?
d. What is the temperature?
e. What sound does it make?
3. Then see if the 2 parts would be willing to cooperate to form a new super part that can help you achieve your goals without being held back by the original part. If so…
4. move your hands together and allow the parts to connect and see if they will merge. If so…
5. the problem is resolved. if not, we can use…
C.The Smack Down (release the part/collapse the anchor)
1. sometimes a part’s usefulness is long gone, but it’s stuck. to let it go we can…
2. make the part in your right hand (the new part) feel even more intense and powerful and then
3. With your right hand, smack down the left hand. this will usually
4. leave you feeling free (sometimes a bit disoriented for a second or two.)
Check in with the original problem at the end to see how you feel now about it.
(If you have a stubborn problem that is still there or keeps coming up, use the “7 Questions for a Breakthrough” on that problem.)
ADDITIONAL NOTES: your right hand can be used to anchor in these positive states so that whenever you need to tune back into them you can put your attention on your right hand and repeat your favorite positive state words. After awhile you can just say one word and it can trigger the good state(s). I use “expert” or “compassion” to tune into my resourceful states.
You can collapse any negative triggers or anchors by immediately putting them into your left hand and then switch your attention to the positive states in your right hand.
Two opposing states can’t exist at the same time, so the temporary, false, state in the left hand collapses and the natural state of confidence and love and peace remain in your right hand.
Once it's resolved and your right hand part is now activated you can always amplify that part more by making it brighter, bigger, wider, etc. and future-pace it by seeing yourself this way in the future.
Do an ecology check, which means you ask if there are any parts of you that object to this positive part, now or in the future. If any part objects or interrupts you now or in the future, stop, pay attention, describe it as above and re-frame that part.
Ask your right hand part: “What can I do to make the Best things happen?” Pay attention to the answers that come up. asking questions is one of the best ways to activate parts because our brains are wired to seek out answers for us when we ask it questions.
Let your subconscious do the work, guessing answers is fine, most of the time they are right for you, but let the unconscious mind come up with answers too, they may pop up and surprise you.
Instruct your unconscious, creative, resourceful, wise mind to come up with 100 new ideas for you and to make the best 3 conscious within the next 24 hours so you will be programming your mind to find these ideas for you. Then watch was the ideas come in at the right time.
There’s really no limit of what you can do with these techniques, or, with your own mind which you now have tools to communicate with it much better and much more effectively.
Healing Is Intentional - Be Mindful Of Yours
Jeanette
(JP)
For my free Training Videos and IPP Session Video, please see my
"INNER PEACE PROCESS" Page, in case you missed it on this blog.
